Monday, November 17, 2008

Seems the worm has turned

from my last entry post of November 6, 2008. It's now November 17, 2008 and I have been on the high protein low carb diet for a week now! I've read the "Protein Power" book several years ago in the late 90's. December 1999 my cholesterol was 280 with in seven months and 20 months my cholesterol was down to 180! Yes. Target is under 200. I ran then too and my HDL was high in the 70's but I was pushing 150!

After that I maintain about a 215 cholesterol level. But in 2004 I split with my partner of 15 years and got down to under 120 in weight..my cholesterol was about 180 then too. One day my weight was 115 and I actually was beginning to worry!

I'm checking back records and in September of 2005 my cholesterol was 202. I was running and eating a lot of sugar aids for energy such as Excel Gel and Glu and crap like that! NO more for me!

Today I'm eating high protein and low carb strictly on my own to get my cholesterol down. The doctor's office sent me a high carb lots of fruits and vegetables, bread and grain diet. No thanks - that how my cholesterol got high in the first place!

I read somewhere that our bodies product cholesterol and the less we get in our diets the more it produces. So I'm eating more lean protein, cottage cheese, creme cheese, sour cream dollops. No more sweets, candy, cakes, and cookes.

A physical therapist friend of mine told me that sweets cause inflamation - so there you are!

I recently heard on NPR that doctors even want to give out statins to people with normal cholesterol levels if they have high c r protein (an indicator of inflamation). Isn't that what we take baby aspirin for? Well, you know the drug companies have to pay for all those commericals that smack you in for face. I guess the idea is to brainwash you. It's amazing to me - people eat what they want then expect the doctor to give them something to fix it. I guess no one has any well power - at all! Everyone wants to take the easy route!

There is no easy route! It's a trade off! It's funny no matter how much money you have in this world.. like these greedy CEO's they still can't eat whatever they want! cha-ching!

So in summary, the worm has indeed turned! Eating healthy my butt! I was eating high carb smoothies with mango, papaya and pears. Candies and sweet too. No more!

Here's to health!

Thursday, November 6, 2008

strange dream ... par for course.. of course

Well, I ate chocloate covered pecans about 9:30 or was it 10:30 PM.. no wonder! But, they were so good!

I'm trying to eat healthy with lots of fruits and vegetable.. smoothies and salads.. much less meat.. I think I am just naturally gravitating away from meats for some reason. Too heavy! I'm leaning more towards marinara pasta dishes or roasted peppers pizza. Great stuff. No cheese - but some.

Anyway, the dream? Could it be my diet? I am always concerned about my vintage SUV. I love it. I don't want to lose it or have to make a decision about a new vehicle or worse yet.. payments! Ugh! So I thank the universe and pray daily for it's safety and mine too of course. I also include all my applicanes and my health and body and brain and youthfulness. I love it! I love my life!

I love the fact that I know I will be running still well into my 80's and probably set records at 90, 100 and beyond. People are doing it now and each year life expectancy increases..with knowledge and I believe, the soul reason, is the soul!

Our spirit guides us..you know the old saying "mind over matter" well, I tottally believe there is more truth in that then what we shallowly believe. Oh people say it but do they truly believe in what they are declaring?

Our minds lead our bodies. Our minds, our thoughts, are the master soul processors that guide our day, our life, our furture. Think I'll hurry and type this and get out there to run... it's 64 degrees, cloudy, breezy and showery. I love it!

Oh the dream! Well for one thing I have a very busy mind. When I get up my thoughts race to complete things I want to do that day. Run, swim, yoga, play my sax, sing and play guitar, play bongos! Read, oh and yes, I should go to the artist guild today.. but do I really feel like it.. too confining and why feel inferior amongst pros. All though some days.. it's no big deal! Oh well!

There I was side tracked again! The dream.. I was driving a Mazda gray sporty looking thing like my friend has..some guy was heading right to me and appearing as if he may then try to turn sharply so I backed up.. so I got minor damage (but not to me) in the back and front! I was truly, heartfully, disgusted because I wish to preserve my car and keep it looking like new..as it did until this. Later.. during the dream I prayed in the dream that I was only dream the accident! I think I convinced myself that it was only a dream.. during the dream! Funny!

Also during the dream.. I was running to a sort of social event maze looking for my ex (things really haven't changed she is my best friend) or L my friend from K.C. I was missing the woman I am dating too.. I couldn't find her either. My heart was aching. I was feeling lonely and a little lost..missing my loves...plural! I found L from K.C. And she was very thin and had a totally different look. She was about about her appearance and later went on to explain now that she lost the weight she was going through the opereation? Operation? Sex change! Totally threw me off guard! But I'm excepting in my responses and throw in a hug!

Then there was another woman there who cornered all women and kissed them fully on the lips.. then I hear people cough (like at yoga rudely during our ending quiet period) and sneeze and then that woman kissed me wetly on the lips.. ugh! Last I remember I was working my way out of that straw, golden orange, village maze! My legs ached.. well not really ached.. It was like running through mud!

Sometimes life seems like that doesn't it, like you're running through mud! I think that came from running a half marathon last Sunday. My time 2:23 and I wanted it to be better more like 2:10 or 2:15 (my best ever was 2:15). Yes, it's on record at the trace club.. ln line if I google my name!

Well, I'm finished here. I am listening too to NPR Joan Baez( or is it Mitchell.. no looked it up.. with Joan Baez!!) Who sang.. "the man who drove old dixie down?". Wish I could play my guitar like that? How have to work on that! What a crystal clear soprano voice and she's in her 70's. I love getting older.. isn't that funny! Like I said.. it'a mental thing. We can't control the chronological age, the number of years we've been around but we certainly can control our thoughts, our spirits, our agility and flexibilities.

Recently a running mat sent me an article of Joy Johnson an 80 year old woman who sarted running at age 59 and runs several competitive runs and marathons throughout the year. She was running marathon in seven hours.. and decided she didn't want to be out there that long..so she enlisted in a runner's camp and did step work, weighs and more and won first place in the New York marathon for her age group 81 Plus. cause she actually trimmed 50 minutes from her time!

Can you imagine. How many "elderly" (not a good adjective here because again a state of mind.. to me elderly mean.. ill and thinking ill thoughts and expecting to be ill and full of aches and pain at a certain age). See those "negative" thoughts are not a part of my daily routine. Like Deepra Chropra says.. aging doesn't mean you have to get sick! Hello!

Do we make ourselves sick? Oh lucks of people with illnesses would be offended at that thought and the audacity of actually stating that commment! But, personally, I wonder? We all have needs, some subconscious. Some people need "attention" (love I guess) and think they only way they can get it is through pain and illness. I disagree. I say do something profoundly happy and pride enhancing.. achieve something outstanding and that promotes health.

Do you think this 80 year old wonder has pain? I saw her run in the video she was smooth and not stooped. She was tall, attractive, straight and proud. I could see very close due to the quality of the video but the author of the article said her she had pretty skin. Is that too amazing?

So, since writing this and of course thinking about all that I am writing.. since I just drank my 16 oz. of Zipp Fizz I am going for a run.

I love to run in the rain.. well, if it's probably sixty degrees and above. So off I go.. but I'm torn should I quick play a tune on my sax to warm my lungs..

I have the sheet music for "Crazy" by Patsy Cline so I want to, this afternoon, I guess, sing and play with guitar..then play with Sax. I'll play solely with sax now, or is it souly? I think souly? I love my life!

Each day I thank the universe and my special master spiritual guides and I ask that my day be magical - and it then later in the evening in retrospect.. I feel that the day was indeed magical. It's how we look at it all you know! It's the simple things! Yoga, with a great instructor! A run in the rain! A wonderful pizza shared with a lover! The warm wonderful beauty and closeness of another body next to me! Pleasing another! It's magical!

I'm spiritual and believe we can create our realities, our environments and our days.. I do just that! I wondered, I believe, to be born and live an active life with a certain, attractiveness, I have that! I appreciate young women's compliments that "you look hot in those running shorts.. are they new"? HOw wonderfully cool is that?... now that's magical!!! And you know what.. I wanted it that way.. I created that moment before it even happens.

Years ago my good buddy Ezekiel (a channeled spirit) told me you will good with younger people.. you are happy with them.. ) and I am... I get the biggest charge out of them.. their energy.. or lack of energy. I think I see that youth isn't really the "end all" but the ideal place to be.. even in youth our state of mind.. our thoughts are very important. They, some of them, have more aches and pains and eating restrictions then I do? So, you see where I get my reasoning? My conclusion that prehaps indeed our thoughts are very powerful.... or another way of saying "I can't". Again, I believe, we create our limitations.

I know I don't ever want to run a marathon.. half marathons are good enough for me...only if I could run it in over three hours. Funny, the forty some year old woman who got the gold ran the maratonn in 2:23.. exactly what it takes me to run a half at 10:20 pace.. so you know her pace was 5:10.. a five minute mile.. is that too extreme or what? Okay off I go.. out to run.. Can't wait.. I'll take NPR with me.

Guess I won't make it to artist guild or I"ll be late. I want to swim today too...see my mind goes in all directions.. I want to do everything.. until I get into one thing and just start doing it.. like run.. come on let's go before I get too hungry!

later........

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Another stressful dream last night

I'm usually isolated without allies and worry what people think of me. Weird! What do I care. I don't now!

My love says she loves her own company.. that she could go days witout talking to anyone.. me too - almost!

But you know! When I am with others... it's all about them anyway - really. Their thoughts; their wants and desires.

I feel centered in my solitude. I've come to make friends with it; with myself! with my spirit guides. With my yoga class. There is something very spiritual about my yoga class.. it's fabulous. I keep trying to convince my love to come with me. It would be wonderful for her.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

scary dreams...why?

I always have scary, stressful dreams. Last night I slept very soundly and woke up in a stress dream. I was yelling at this guy, just because he was there and I was trying to do many things at one time. I was trying to second guess or predict what another wanted too. I knew I couldn't get it all done the more I realized what I had to do yet...as I walked through the house leaving - I saw her in the kitchen, or like a kitchen, for a second - the good doctor. A flash of comfort and shame too, I hoped she didn't hear me yell at that guy! I try so hard to please, to impress!

I'm scared about the economy. I worry! I'm sure the universe is filled with vibrations of worry and that is not good. I try to keep a positive attitude!

It's hard but in my heart, my intuition tells me that all will be fine. And soon! Right after the big super eight countries meet this weekend. Let's see if I can name them. England, Canada, Germany, Russia, France, Italy, I need two more..maybe it was seven countries. The ones I mentioned above are one that I am sure are on the list to meet this weekend and help get the economy balanced onced again.

Anyway, these are scary times. We are all uneasy. I pray to the universe for peace and good fortune for everyone! I pray this economical mess gets cleared up quickly and we "all" prosper - not just the rich - the crooked rich. May they be prosecuted and some of these bonuses, golden parachutes removed and given to share holders and employees.

I thank for universe for my wonderful, most generous, kind friends who say they miss me and invite me to events! Life is priceless that way! I am very rich! I am wealthy in matters of the heart! Very wealthy! Friends are priceless!

I thank for universe for my painfree, accident free activities. My strong lungs, my agile abilities.

Sunday, July 20, 2008

Strangle dreams

Enclosed dreams. Feelings of being bonded and not being able to get loose. Strangle-hold dreams.

I was having dream such as this recently I believe, because I was confused and trapped in deciding between relationships. I guess one can decide? One is free and one is not.

I choose the single, free one. The strangle hold dreams have ended.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

sweet dream

finally I had a sweet warm dream. Most of my life my dreams have been filled with anxiety. This was about a very sweet and attractive woman putting the moves and me; gently I might add. Just enough to let me know that she was very interested.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

the rivers are rising and my dream relates to this and to M's pot and self destructive stubbornness.

I was dreaming a small, aged man sat in his own world drinking. Someone kept bossing me and telling me what I should do; that I should hurry that cleaning or whatever had to be done in a certain way. Bug things that shifting and moving. Things in bright colors moved. Someone was always on me causing mental stress. I was to hurry; they would be here soon.

The little man like character confined to drink. Sat bent, rounded shoulders with head down. Quiet warped and engulped in the duty of self sacrifice. The we were called. I see unrecognizable dark shallow figures in shapes of han form. I heard myself yelling about hopefully self destructive behavior that falls on death ears. Soon we are called to duty like demand. The man, the boss is coming. Time to jump into action which showed up as a mighty debris flowing brown river 20 feet below our cliff we stood on. I was expected to jump according to the little old man into the obyss. I hesitated thinking it foolish and dangerous. The little old man having to prove himself one more time knowing he is professional and able to compete jumps before my very eyes. He hits bunched floating timbers and soon I see his face down floating body. With fear gripping my heart I run. Like a shadow memory the action repeats two more times and each time I feel that I am expected to jump but I catch myself and hold back in safety each time.

I remain wise and free. I tried but I am not self destructive enough for my heart is in a different place.

I thin the dream is about dual personallity perhaps M. Feminine in dutifull marriage and perhaps nutch at heart not really expecting a woman to stand by her side but loving that woman and the man she will not leave.